School saftely...

Amelina Chamberlain

Amelina Chamberlain

New Member
A couple of you know about a situation I had a while back concerning inappropriate touching towards my daughter. The situation was " resolved ", at least that's what the Principle has said. Keep in mind, this is first grade we are talking about here.

Now, recently, there has been more problems. A child was forced to perform an act that children should know nothing about. It has been reported to the police, and they have done their part. The school on the other hand has not. The offending child was simply moved out of one class and placed in another. The principle is pretty much shoving this under the rug as well.

I am writing a letter to the papers, and while I think I may have it all covered, I was wondering what type of points ya'll think should be placed in such a letter. Keep in mind, i'm not naming the school in my letter, or naming any names. The only name that will be mentioned will be mine when I sign it. I will post my letter here for you to read and leave suggestions.

I only ask that if you have nothing possitive to say, to say nothing at all. This is a very serious matter, and I am asking, pleading for help. Thanks

Robin


What’s wrong with our schools?

Are we teaching our youth that sexual assault is acceptable? This is the question I pose to you as a community. Whether you have a child in school or not, you need to be made aware of a growing problem in our Mountain Home School District. A school district that, at one time, prided itself on school excellence.

We as parents expect our children to be protected while at school. We expect the staff of the school to watch and educate our children on acceptable behavior. Before children reach school age, we look for certain qualities in child care providers. We look for the same qualities in our children’s teachers and school administrators as they get older. It all comes down to feeling our children are safe. What, then, can we do, when that safe environment is compromised?

During this past school year, that safe feeling has indeed been shattered. Around our last holiday season, a little girl was grabbed inappropriately. A few weeks later, four boys attempted to pull three girls into the boys’ bathroom, succeeding with one.

When these incidents were reported to school staff, a teacher replied with the mentality of “ Boys will be boys. “ The principal dismissed the situations just as easily, ignoring parental requests for punishment in these instances. The principal stated that the situation had been resolved. In all actuality, dismissing this lead to bigger problems.

Recently, before spring break, a child was forced to perform an act that children of that age should not know about, let alone try and force on another child. Police were notified in this instance, and while they did their job, the school has not. They suspended the offending child for the remainder of the school week of the occurrence. Which was only one day before spring break. Upon return to school, all they did was remove the child from one class and put him into another first grade classroom.

The victim’s mother was told, by the principal, that she could remove “ her “ child from the school. Yet, they do nothing to the one who did the offense. Once again, it is this mentality that will, no doubt, cause more problems in the future. We need to ensure that those charged with the safety of our children do their jobs appropriately. If they fail, as with any job, we should look for a suitable replacement.

Last school year, a boy was expelled for kissing a girl on campus. Yet these offenses go unpunished when they are by far, worse. We as a community need to speak up and be heard. These situations can not go unnoticed. Something has to be done.

If the school district won’t do anything about these problems, maybe we as a community can. The future of our youth is at stake. Yes we need to allow our children to fight their own battles, but there is a line to be drawn. We need to stand by our youth, they are our future.
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You are being kind of vague with the situation. Without knowing more, its hard for me to make any sort of intelligent commentary. However, this is what I've got so far.

A) When you describe the act that happened as 'something children shouldn't even know about yet' it may come off as you trying to tell others how to parent. Some people really aren't going to care so much about some boys pushing a girl into the boys bathroom. Thats a prank we used to pull at my school all the time, except it was usually boys trying to push another boy into the girls bathroom. Now, if something else happened, other than just pushing into the bathroom, then there might be cause for concern. You really can't tell what some people think is appropriate and what isn't. Of course, the grabbing incident is a little bit different.

B) If you want to be taken seriously, don't use the 'children are our future' line. I am using all of my willpower to not mock you for it, and I do find this to be a very serious subject.

C) Name names. If you really want something to be done, don't be afraid to point the finger. If you allow the people who did wrong to hide behind anonymity, then they are free to make the same mistakes over again. Assuming that neither the school, or the authorities are willing to do more, then the best you can hope for is to humiliate those responsible into leaving town.

D) As far as a piece of writing goes, I think there is too much fluff and filler in your opening. No one cares whether the school used to pride itself on anything, if there is a sexual assault problem going on. You are obviously posing a question to the community, so you don't need to reiterate that. It also could be structured a little better. Keep in mind that this is a letter to a newspaper, so if you want it published, it needs to be worthy of the ink. Some people might think of this as exploiting this situation for publicity, but if you really want to get a message out, the only way to do it is to get people's attention enough so that they keep reading the whole letter.
 
I agree with SJ on all points and would also like to point out that when you mention the part about the mother being told that she could move her daughter to another school and nothing was done to the little boy except that he was moved to another class, it comes across as if you are just saying that the boy should be punished. I understand the need to express that he faced no consequences for his actions, but at the same time, I think the phrasing is a little off cause it just seems more vindictive than productive.

I might just be reading it wrong, but the wording somehow suggests that. Sorry if I'm not making sense right now. Basically, what I'm trying to say is that it seems as if the boy is taking more blame than the school at that point. While the boy isn't blameless, if he is very young and is doing things he shouldn't be, then the problem falls not only for the school to correct, but the parents as well, and I think that should be mentioned.

Bleah. Two trips to the doctor's and meds are confusing me. Do you understand what I'm saying?
 
Okay.. you both make sense. The goal of this letter is to make the community aware of the problem and maybe as a whole we can do something about it. Am I vindictive? Not in the least. I am a concerned parent. As for the vague situation, a first grade boy pinned another in the bathroom and forced him to perform orally. That is what I believe a child of that age should not know about.

Am I blaming a parent? In this case, yes I am. Because when the police investigated, it turned out the mother of the offending child, knew her son was assaulted in such a way a year and a half ago and failed to report it. I think she personally needs to be beaten to an inch of her life. But hey, that's me, i'm protective.

Naming names... yeah, I thought about that... still debating. But this letter is only a rough draft. The school is at a complete fault here.. by not doing anything they are teaching those who do it, that their actions are okay. Parents needs to teach their children as well. In an age when people are so quick to " drug " their kids, parents aren't taking the time to instill proper manners, and knowledge. They aren't teaching their kids morals or what is right and wrong.
 
I did a little work around on your letter.

What’s wrong with our schools administration/policies ? Whether you have a child in school or not, you need to be made aware of a growing problem in our Mountain Home School District. During this past school year, the safe feeling I had with the MHSD (School name as well) has indeed been shattered. Around our (You may want to state the holiday) last holiday season, a little girl was grabbed inappropriately. A few weeks later, four boys attempted to pull three girls into the boys' bathroom, succeeding with one (needs more explaintion as in did something happen to the girl who was pulled in as well if any punishment resulted for the prior incidents) .

This was not the end of these disturbing incidents , recently, before spring break, a child was forced to perform an indecent act upon another child, that children of that age should not know about, let alone try and force on another child. Police were notified in this instance, and while they did their job, the school has not. The offending child was suspended for one day before spring break and then transferred to another class. When these incidents were reported to school staff, a teacher (name the teacher and her postion) replied with the mentality of " Boys will be boys. " The principal (Mr. Dumbass ) dismissed the situations just as easily, ignoring numerous parental requests for punishment in these instances and allowing this trend of behavior to continue, while alternatively the victim's mother was told, by the principal, that she could remove " her " child from the school. Yet, they do little to curtail this behavior and even attempt to force out the victim . Once again, it is this mentality that will, no doubt, cause more problems in the future.

Last school year, a boy was expelled for kissing a girl on campus. Yet these offenses go unpunished when they are by far, worse. We need to ensure that those charged with the safety of our children do their jobs appropriately. If they fail, as with any job, we should look for a suitable replacement. We as parents expect our children to be protected while at school. We expect the staff of the school to watch and educate our children on acceptable behavior. If the school district won't do anything about these problems, then we as a community must. Yes we need to allow our children to fight their own battles, but there is a line that needs to be drawn. We as a community need to speak up and be heard. The Mountain Home School District can no longer turn a blind eye to these situations, and we can not let them go on unnoticed.
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Another Note would be have you or the victims been incontact with the administration of the district ? As well you mention three incidentsI believe and was the boy who forced himself on the other child involved in all three or just the one ? You need to be specific when leveling these kinds of statements.
 
Sorry...I didn't mean to make it sound like I said you were being vindictive. I'm actually more awake now, at 2 am, than I was when I first posted.

Let me clarify. I definately think the letter needs to be sent, without question. I'm just saying it sounded vindictive, not that it was. Personally, if someone forced my child into doing something against her will, because I've been in the situation, I would do a helluva lot more than write a letter or call their parents. Confrontation would be involved and it wouldn't be a pleasant experience because I would make it a point to drag the parent into the center of the town and publicly proclaim the mother a whore, the father a sadist and the child a victim of child abuse. That's vindictive.

I don't know why I get the impression about the one part of the letter. Something is just....off....I guess about the way it was worded or something. It's not even something I can really pinpoint, but like I said, it's just the phrasing.
 
Hmm okay. The boy who forced himself on another boy, he wasn't involved in the other two situations. The boy who grabbed my daughters private area was involved in trying to pull girls into the bathroom. The one girl they did pull into the bathroom was locked in there while they tried to get others in. Yeah, it's a prank some play, but it's still inappropriate behavior.

Thanks for the rewrite, i'll play with it a bit more as well. I gotta talke to the other parents and see if we should name names or not. My personal thought was that if I go rippin up some names, i.e. Put the school, the teacher, principal, it would seem like a personal attack. Which in a way it is, but I didn't want it to come off as vindictive. The letter is just to get out to the community.

Soon though, we are going to the School District Board meeting, and that is where we are going to demand the principal offer her resignation and a more suitable person be put into office. This woman is ignorant as fuck and needs to be removed. We also have a petition going around as well for better school procedures. Especially since the school has a " keep your hands, feet, all objects to yourself " policy. That -is- stated in the handbook they get at the begining of each school year.

Ask my daughter what the golden rule of school is, and she'll state it word for word. Yet they don't enforce it. Anyhow, ty for the help, it's appreciated.
 
What's really sad is (I'm assuming you come from a small town like me where there are only about 1,000 people total in the entire community, if that many) when you speak up about the situations in a small town, either everyone is with you or everyone is against you and depending upon what your last name is, (I.E. Patterson, Wall, Hutchinson, etc.) you can get away with murder or not (I.E. McKinney, McCarroll my maiden name, Mckenna, etc.).
 
I realize I'm a bit tardy on this, but I went to bed before it was started, whattya want?

Anyway. I was just going to add my voite. As a parent of young children, starting off I would say naming the school district as you did was a must, I am also somewhat leaning toward naming the actual school. Teachers, principals and students names definately leave out. But the school? I'm not saying 100% to put it in there, but for all my effort I can't bring myself to say no, either.
 
Well put it this way, if this base closed, this would be a ghost town. And Military has ZERO tolerance on this. There are so many military personel, that their kids have to go to the town schools. There are three elementary schools, so it's not that small, but it is small. We just have alot of children lol.

As for putting the school in, I thought about that. But being i'm talking about the principial, they would no doubt know who i'm talking about. I'm gonna talke to a few of the other parents who are putting their name on this letter, see what they think.
 
I think you should contact the local paper and suggest/ask them to tend the next school board meeting with you and bring this matter up. It's Very possible they are not aware of it nor other parents. Just a suggestion.
 
Good. Little boys who grow up man handling young girls grow up to be pigs. And those who ignore, sweep it under the rug and don't correct the behavior should be be publicly abused so they can get a good taste of what it's like.*grumbles*
 
Amelina, you should get us a copy of the letter and see how it turned out, I would like to see it if possible.
 
UnHoly Charm said:
Good. Little boys who grow up man handling young girls grow up to be pigs. And those who ignore, sweep it under the rug and don't correct the behavior should be be publicly abused so they can get a good taste of what it's like.*grumbles*
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Only too true. Zero tolerance is the only way in resolving this very serious problem. You simply cannot sweep inappropriate behaviour such as that you mentioned under the proverbial carpet.
 
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