Why is it

U

UnHoly Charm

Guest
That if you disagree with friends discission in a project and remove yourself from said project your treated like your a stranger?
 
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Well that is a difficult question because people can have many reasons treating you differently after something similar to what you discribed. The main reason that comes to my mind is that they feel hurt and betrayed by ones leaving of the project. As they may have believed the project was an extension of themselves. Thus they make the choice to treat you like an enemy or a stranger.
 
The person you are describing obviously wished you to go along with the project and wished you to continue with the project. As a consequence of your disagreement, that person is most probably annoyed and, as Mith said above, you're seen now as an enemy of sorts and an obstacle to that person's personal goals.
 
True friends shouldn't reject you, or make you feel that they have, for having a "different" view on things.
If you don't agree on how things should be done that will only place a strain on said friendship.
The friend should appreciate the fact that you know you wouldn't be able to "help" when you disagree on certain matters.
 
Charm, but your asking the ideal of perfect friendship, and that is a good aspiration to aim for, but not one to be truly realized. People friends, lovers, enemies, and anyone in between are people first. They will act to what best suits their mood, and they may regret it after they take a few moments and reflect, but they cannot change how they reacted.

The only thing that can be done is an apology and a real friend will accept it, begrudgingly or not. Allow them time for their pain and anger to recede a bit, and then wait for them to apologize. That seems to be the only way that kind of problem is ever resolved in my experience. Either that or if you know them face to face, I have found punching them in the forhead works wonders too. Yes you all should feel sorry for my best friend. Anyhow I'm Off!
 
I guess if they are so thick headed that they can not see my reasons, and accept that and not hold it against me, nothing more can be said nor done.
 
I myself have gone through such problems as this. In all honesty, within my opinion on friendship projects it is best to go towards goals with acquaintances rather then friends. Reasons why is because whenever there is a project going on there will, and always be some sort of disagreement or two. This can lay a problem within the fabric of what your point of view friendship may or may not be.

I agree with Mithrandirxx when he states that the person may feel somewhat hurt or even betrayed, specially if the person in question is someone who is most motivated into the project. I also believe with what Raharanor said reasons why is because, when someone does not wish to pursue with the project at hand, usually the ones who are most motivated feel somewhat threatened. To me this is why Human Relations fascinate me so much because of how the human mind works.

I guess if they are so thick headed that they can not see my reasons, and accept that and not hold it against me, nothing more can be said nor done.
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You are exactly right, nothing more, or less can be done. The best thing you can do is wait, and hope the friend stops alienating you.

Either that or if you know them face to face, I have found punching them in the forehead works wonders too.
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Whoot, another cool thing o.o, though you should get a buddy to hold the person down so you wont get hit back >_>.
 
Usiel, having someone hold them down just makes them want reveng even more and adds in another person for them to target. When you just up and pop someone in the Noggin, they usualy are rather confussed, and then you explain it to them. Or if you are dealing with my best friend he laughs thinking you just broke your hand, or he stares at you wondering what the hell he did to deserve that hit.

Anyhow I am off after I say one more thing. Humans often find problems where they are not or condem others for sins they cannot prove. Thusly we have issues between friends that act like gun powder waiting for the spark of a real altercation. So we should realize anytime we have a fight the fight not ber what's truely eating at them.
 
I would think that a 10 yr friendship could withstand something like this. Friends should be able to accept that they don't always have think the same, nor participate within something they don't agree with.
All this tells me that the friendship was "more" one sided.
And though it hurts me that things have played out as they have, my eyes see things more clearly.
 
UnHoly Charm said:
I would think that a 10 yr friendship could withstand something like this. Friends should be able to accept that they don't always have think the same, nor participate within something they don't agree with.
All this tells me that the friendship was "more" one sided.
And though it hurts me that things have played out as they have, my eyes see things more clearly.
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You would assume that what you've described could stand the trials of long-time friendship. However, this person, even though they might have considered you a good friend, they would have had other ambitions driving them as well...the ambition to have everyone agree with him on something or another in regards to the place you described. A combination of ambition, greed and asking too much of your friend can potentially and can break friendships.

Richard
 
I have sent an e-mail wishing that person a merry christmas. That will be my last attempt to salvage the friendship.
 
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